Monday, September 15, 2008

Rescued From Vicious Attack

As the weekend was approaching I was getting really excited! We, the Ignition Leadership Team had a retreat in July and that was full of just planning. Making sure that what we were doing was for God and not what we thought Ignition should be. That was in July. Now is September. We felt like we needed a getaway to find out more about each other and bond a bit more. Layla came and picked me up and we went grocery shopping. Go grocery shopping with Layla. She can push a cart really well! Kevin got us a sick car for the ride. A Chevy Suburban. It was so amazing! The drive was so good! We went out for Thai food and gelato at La Paloma! SO GOOD! When we arrived at the cottage we just settled in as much as we could and hung out. Waking up on Saturday was interesting. From the second I woke up, my spirit didn't feel right. I had a really heavy heart in the morning and didn't know what the cause was. I had a strong urge to cry. I have a feeling I must have had some sort of weird dream but I can't remember it. I decided to leave it alone and go make breakfast for everyone. The morning and afternoon were great! We went swimming in the freezing, cold lake and in the sauna. (We're at the Watsons cottage by the way. So Beautiful!) Lounging was so great! There was nothing but amazing nature around us that it was so hard to ignore the outside. I had a great nap on Saturday afternoon. Around 5pm on Saturday afternoon, it felt like someone was grabbing my heart and squeezing the life out of it. Not physically, but spiritually. I went outside to talk to Layla. I shared with her how I was feeling and we screamed out loud to get rid of pent up energy, good and bad. I felt as though I was being attacked in my spirit. Like I was trying to fight something but wasn't winning. I felt defeated and tired but the attacks kept coming. I felt my body fold in on itself. I felt as though I was a little child hiding from something. Even when I was outside I felt as though I was being stifled. I had no space. My heart was hurting so much. Layla started to pray for me. She prayed that I would have grace for myself. I went to bed that night a bit calm in my heart. the next day (Sunday) we got together as a group and shared something about ourselves that the others didn't know. Not silly things, but characteristics that were not noticable if not said. After that, is when I felt free.

1 comment:

Andrea said...

It's amazing, the freedom and power that comes with being vulnerable. So glad you guys had the weekend together to just be.